Q & A Table of Contents
Nasty Habits-Too Close for Comfort
From: Harry, New York City
Question: I work as an Analyst with this company. The person I work with sits
right next to me and has a very dirty habit of picking his nose all the
time. On the other side of me, there is another person who keeps humming
songs all the time.
I really don't know how to tell each one of them, especially the one who
keeps digging his nose, that it is a very dirty and disgusting habit.
Response: Dear Harry,
If the people between whom you sit are at the same hierarchical level as
you, it may be a little less difficult than if either of them is at a
superior level.
You have an interest in a comfortable workplace, it will help you be more
productive. You have an interest in feeling personally comfortable and not
offended by what is going on next to you; it would reduce your stress level.
Cheap shots might involve changing the location of your workspace, changing
the direction in which you look. But that is not likely to solve the
problem.
The nose-picking is indeed something that cannot be masked. The humming may
be overcome if you start listening to a Walkman -- if that is allowed.
You may be concerned that if you raise the issue of nose-picking and humming
you might embarrass your colleagues. It may be, however, that they have an
interest in developing a comfortable work environment, and that could
include not causing offense to their colleagues.
Frankly the simplest approach would appear to be talking with each one
separately saying that they may not have noticed, but they seem to have
developed habits that you can't help but notice -- and about which you are
bothered.
They may not be aware of their habits. If their reaction is hostile, then
it is time to move to a different location. If your approach is friendly
and understanding, then you may be in a better position to convince them to
practice their habits in private.
Ultimately, unless you are honest about your sensitivities, these people
will not be aware of them. If other people in the office have also noticed
these habits, you may have allies who can, separately, approach the
miscreants and ask for an improved office environment. But honesty is
certainly the best policy in this situation.
If you have already tried these approaches, let me know, and we'll see what
else comes to mind. You won't be able to reach me again for three weeks,
but I wish you luck in the meantime.
Sincerely,
Steve
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