Q & A Table of Contents
She Leaves Her Work For Me To Do
From: Juliet, Wisconsin
Question: I have been having some problems with a co-worker.
She is a very slow worker and I work fast. I've been working with her for almost two years and it seems she takes advantage of the fact that I work fast. She will leave things undone knowing that I will do it.
I work in a school kitchen and if these jobs don't get done, the kids are the ones to suffer for it. I told her how I felt and now she isn't speaking to me. I don't feel that I did any thing wrong by standing up for myself. Did I do the right thing? She asked me to be honest with her. My only mistake is that I let it go on too long without saying anything.
Response: If your co-worker asked you to be honest with her, unless you used inappropriate language, your answer was fundamental the right thing to do.
When things bother you, if you don't assert yourself early in the situation, when things are relatively small, problems escalate and get tougher to solve. While you may take some blame on yourself for having waited too long to raise the issues, the fact is your co-worker has been letting you down, probably doing the same to other members of the staff, and creating the risk that the kids may not get the service they deserve.
You should approach your co-worker and indicate that you have a very real interest in a harmonious work atmosphere. Ask her how she feels about that issue -- and what thoughts she has about the problems you raised. Listen closely to her answers for hints of how best to communicate with her -- what is important to her? what are her hot buttons? etc.
You need to let her know that you are upset with yourself for not having spoken up earlier, but that since she asked for your honesty, you would have been disrespectful of her if you had withheld your true feelings.
If she refuses to communicate with you, you need to consider your alternatives. Has she changed her work habits? Do you have a supervisor who can give the two of you separate assignments so it is clear who is doing the job and who is falling behind? Are there other people in your crew with whom you can strengthen your relationships to build your support network?
Good luck in a tough spot,
Steve
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