Q & A Table of Contents
Split Personality Negotiators
From: Taha, Karachi, Pakistan
Question: Do you agree that a good negotiator should have more then two persons in his personality?
Response: Good negotiators should not make conscious choices to change their personalities to fool other parties. A good negotiator is often characterized as someone whose personality includes integrity — which is often more elaborately described as ‘WYSIWYG’ (what you see is what you get).
Generally speaking, people are uncomfortable negotiating with someone who has a hidden agenda. If the person with whom I am negotiating is hiding something from me, I will have difficulty trusting them. If I cannot trust the person with whom I am negotiating, then I cannot trust that he or she will fulfill the agreement we reach.
It is crucial to act with the understanding that negotiation is not a competitive sport. You compete with your opponents, you collaborate with people with whom you want to arrive at a durable, wise agreement.
A skilled negotiator needs to be able to comprehend the varied interests of the broadest possible range of stakeholders in any deal. The better one understands the interests of one’s negotiation counterparty, the greater the likelihood the negotiators will be able to reach an agreement each will willingly fulfill. That is the test of whether a negotiation has been successful.
Therefore, a good negotiator should not try to be a person with multiple personalities, but rather a person with a well-integrated sense of herself or himself that enables him/her to empathize with other stakeholders and consider creative ways to bring the parties together in agreement.
Good luck,
Steve
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